Thinking Straight

I do want to get better, so I've decided what it is I'm going to start with.

The first thing I need to do is stop the food diary. No matter how little I write down, I feel guilty. From now on it's not happening. One of the advantages of it was if I was thinking I ate far too much I could reassure myself that it wasn't so bad by having this concrete list, but I'll just have to man up and survive.

Secondly I'm going to stop the self-harm. Easier said than done, but it's only a matter of time before it escalates. I already have some massive, disgusting scars on my arm and giving myself matching ones on my thigh will not help my body image.

Thirdly, I need to weigh myself less. I'll start by restricting myself to once a day, in the evening.

I found out earlier that I have a job interview next week. If I get this job it'll help a lot. It's only part-time but I need more structure to my day. Plus the interview is for a job I'd love to have. 

I'm hoping the next couple of days go well with this, if they do then I'm going to try to take a bit more control over my general eating habits, but if I try  to do it now it'll end badly. I'm praying this goes well.